Category Archives: Epiphanies

Moments of conscious clarity

Sea Fog

The sea fog reaches out,
A tentacled blanket dissolving,
Into creviced streets,
Damping streetlights,
Obscuring the signs.
How few we are in the fog,
Lost, without direction,
children, alone,
our heartlight glow,
our belief in things we can not see,
pierce the veil and comfort
our worry and dubious doubt.

For Randall Craig Smith

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Earning my posession

You can not control what you do not posess.
You can not posess what you do not own.
You can not own what you have not earned.

-h.

The world is better with you in it…

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A single thought can change the course of a person’s life. Some consciousness woke me early one morning with a very simple thought. That I needed so very desperately to understand. sleeping next to my lover I woke with strong and passionate desire to find the words that in some way could confide to him one sentiment exactly the weight of his importance to me; of my love for him. And, over and over I heard my head, “the world is such a better place with you in it.” And it struck me … how often do we hear from others that we were significant to some degree in their lives, that our mere being is a light? That without even doing anything but being ourselves we are justified in being, because it is just the quality that is us that the world needed every day of our lives.

It was certainly true what I heard how hard it was for him just to be himself for most of his life. Bullied, played the fool, taken for granted, but for all of the things that may have happened to him before we met, good, bad or otherwise, he survived to be here in my life and in such a beautiful, powerful and fullfilling way that I want him to never to go another day without looking into my eyes and seeing not just – I love you- but also that the world is such a better place with him in it…

Now in writing this I hear the voice inside my head say to myself the world a better place with you in it and I began to wonder if that little truism isn’t something we all must come to believe about ourselves. If I believe it about my lover that his presence made my life better then it is made itself true whether he sees it about himself or not. But, Regardless of his awareness The truth that the world is better with him in it remains an undeniable fact. He made my life my world better just being exactly who he is; and I in turn pass all that love, kindness, generosity, thoughtfulness, and childlike wonderment forward to countless others.

Just in the past and month he has helped me through some hard times to ease the sorrow of a long time friend who just lost his father to cancer, to counsel and to listen to another friend who is dying from Crohn’s disease, to help me stop letting my own diseases be the ruin of my life. All of this and so much more he has done and even if I stop listing items here, it is surely more than enough to convince anyone that world is a better place with him in it.

Now, what about you? if you’re reading this right now at this very moment our timelines are crossing and no matter how vastly separated by time, race, language, beliefs, or sex we are… with these words I reached out to you and say the world is a better place with you in it. With your eyes on the page, I’m virtually right beside you whispering that the world a better place with you in it. With a clairvoyant like sense, i know you were going to be reading this… because you’ve read this far in this text, it indicates to me that we would be kindred spirits, your attempt understand what I’m trying to say has warmed my heart… and that warmth, makes me stop now this writing, and hold my lover and wake him to tell him that the world is a better place with him in it,  and with me in it, and with you in it; because I assure you it’s going to make him smile!

Thank you for making the world a better place. 🙂

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