No one knows its me…

Being in the world is sometimes very scary a prospect. Especially if you seem to have lost your sense of purpose. Perhaps, children have it right; they PRETEND.  It seems that imagination has been the most powerful tool I’ve ever used to work change in my life.
How quickly fear seems to diminish when I replace all of my self conscious insecurities with the perspective of being the star of my very own movie or tv show. Not indulging delusional thinking, but rather like “putting on” a character’s attributes like one would a power tie; with like say the characteristics of Erica Kane, or Lynda Carter’s Wonder Woman, Jamie Summers, Jen Claude VanDam, the Vampire Lestat, or Tyler Perry’s Madea…..
There seems to be a skill or ability that each of these sample persona’s have that could best one or more of life’s obstacles that I alone would have a harder time coping with. But in the process of pretending to be say “Madea”, my brain seems to imagine how they would conquer my problem, and if I work out mentally how they did it, I can apply it in my real life… But most times I seem to find that I succeed even easier if I fake it till I make it by actually embodying the character and acting as them in realtime. Pretending while still im the real world takes away the problem of low self esteem that I sometimes butt up against.
Eventually I hope that repeated successes in life will bolster my confidence enough to add my name to the list of characters I can put on to draw strength from. Then maybe I could begin to be confident enough to just be myself….
It seems silly, maybe to most people, a bit unduly complicated, but in a pinch, this does seem to help me find strength to get through problems in realtime, and not be defeated by self doubt, low self esteem,  or insecurity witch have slain me many more times than the problems I have faced in life.
Freeing myself from immobility and actually tackeling problems, regardless of how or who go about it (as), has a far better prospect of success than inaction and indecision.